From The Salty Sgt, this unisex tee is the perfect blend of sarcasm and street wisdom. Featuring a minimalist broken handcuff icon and the brutally honest line “YOU CAN’T CUFF STUPID – BUT WE TRY” in a rugged stencil-style font, this shirt says what every cop has thought at least once per shift.
Set against faded black on charcoal or olive green, the design keeps things low-profile and tactical — just like you. Whether you’re in booking, briefing, or hitting the gas to your third nonsense call of the hour, this tee will earn nods from your squad (and side-eyes from command).
Design Features:
Clean line art of broken handcuffs
Stencil-style all-caps text: "YOU CAN’T CUFF STUPID – BUT WE TRY"
Distressed effect for a worn, field-tested look
Printed large and centered for high visibility
Color options: Charcoal, Olive Green, or Faded Black
T-Shirt Details:
Unisex fit with shoulder taping for structure
100% premium cotton for all-day comfort
Soft but durable, perfect for post-shift sarcasm
Tear-away label for minimal irritation
Great fit for under outer vests or stand-alone wear
Perfect For:
Patrol officers with a sense of humor (and trauma)
Booking room philosophers
Gift for law enforcement friends who’ve “seen it all”
Subtle sarcasm at squad meetings, conferences, or gym days
